Explore Life's Insights 

Seeing one another, and ourselves, with soft eyes. On meeting one another, and ourselves, exactly where we are When we watch young children playing outside, we might see them chasing and laughing — until someone gets caught, falls to the ground, and has a spectacular meltdown before storming off: I don't want to play with you anymore! We watch the child run to their mother to be consoled, and we think nothing of it. We do not conclude that something is fundamentally wrong wit

Could I be happy too? On the manifesting myth, and where happiness actually lives If you keep wondering why you are struggling to be happy, this is for you. A gentle look at where happiness truly comes from — and why we only find it when we stop chasing it. If I make this statement: happiness can only come from within. Most of us feel an instant resistance to that statement. No, no — surely if I found the love of my life, got my lucky break, had enough money, finally booked t

On otherness, oneness, and the grace to come home Have you ever looked at someone and thought: you and I are two very different kinds of people, my friend. I am not even sure we come from the same planet! This usually happens just after someone does something so strange or stunning that it stops you dead in your tracks, mouth open. I am sure most of you know exactly what I am talking about. We feel the difference between us in other, everyday ways as well. Especially when we

On the quiet cost of mattering to everyone except yourself Many of us were taught that self-love is selfish. Here is the difference between selfishness and self-love — and why an empty tank helps no one. Over the last two decades, I have sat with thousands of people who came to me because they were stuck — emotionally and mentally depleted, spiritually at a breaking point. By the time they found their way to me, things were serious. Marriages were ending. Work felt like a har

On the difference between loving and enabling — and the question worth sitting with

On negative self-talk, the cake without eggs, and the most liberating realisation on the spiritual path Most of us were never taught to be curious about ourselves. We were taught to perform, to improve, to fix. And so when something goes wrong — when the cake comes out as crumbs again — our first instinct is not to wonder. It is to blame or to collapse. We blame ourselves for not being good enough, as though shame itself will produce a better outcome next time. But shaming ou

What compassion and boundaries really mean — and why you need both For years I suffered at the hands of an abusive father who drank too much. When he drank — and sometimes when he didn't — I had the distinct feeling that I was in his way. That he would have preferred life without me in it. I lived in that environment until my teenage years, when I finally accepted that I would never receive the love I craved from him. That acceptance was a relief — but it opened a long se

One closes the heart. The other keeps it open. I came home from a long trip away to find my houseplants in a sorry state. Some had already perished. I had asked my housekeeper, Patience, to water them while I was gone — and it was obvious they had not received the care I would have given them myself. I felt the anger stir. That particular kind of anger that usually masks helplessness — the need to become loud so we feel we have some power to change things. But something in me

On emotional withdrawal, control, and the patterns that keep us stuck Most of us have done it. Gone quiet in a way that builds an impenetrable wall. Given someone the cold shoulder and told ourselves it was for our own protection. Withdrawn, pulled back, kept quiet — and waited to see what would happen next. It feels like the only option we have. And sometimes, it genuinely is. But if we are honest — really honest — closing our hearts is sometimes something else too. It is a

You know that feeling. The one that starts as internal discomfort and can lead to severe inner pain — a tight chest, a fuming silence, a frustration of thoughts looping in the dark at 2am. Why does it feel so hard? Can't we just be in harmony? Most of us know the quiet ache of being at odds with someone we love. And what makes it so exhausting is not just the conflict itself — it is the gap between how much we love someone and how much they can hurt us. The pain we feel whe